How to raise a Neanderthal child

The proud mother of a deep Thal child writes in to ask for advice on raising him. I won’t post a pic of the baby – here’s one off Google instead that looks about the same, albeit older:

Here’s the email:

Dear Koanic Soul,

I am writing to you for advice on raising what appears to be a pure Thal. I realize your time is precious, however, I think this information could be useful to your readers, many of whom are doubtless raising Thals as well.

I am not quite sure to what degree my husband and I are Thal. I come from a long line of Polish intellectuals. Very high IQ (150s+), very Aspie, mostly scholars and researchers (my grandfather is an almost autistic nuclear physicist), though some melonheads, including several Polish senators. My husband and I were very introverted, bookish children, testing in the 130s, with high verbal intelligence. My husband was more aggressive and conflicted as a child, however, which suggests hybridization. In our late teens, we took active steps to be more extroverted, though it still doesn’t come naturally. We both craved a close knit family and married at 20 & 23, probably one of few Ivy League couples to marry that young. We are now 23 & 26 and have 2 young children. I am a linguist specializing in Slavic languages (fluent in 5), while my husband is in medical school, though we technically have enough family money to not work. Random point, but both my husband and I have an insanely high pain tolerance. My labors last less than an hour and I easily deliver without pain medication. My husband and I are also tall (5’10” and 6’2”) and very robust, as is our son, though our (suspected melonhead) daughter is very delicate and petite.

Enter – our Thal son. He is now 2 years old and a very unusual, extremely altruistic child. He will literally take food out of his mouth if you ask and shares his toys without exception, even if he’s not particularly excited about the idea. He is incredibly gentle and sweet among family and friends, though he becomes standoffish around strangers. In a preschool setting, he stands off in the corner, staring at the other meatheaded children, and refuses to participate. He is incredibly sensitive child – if he accidentally hurts his sister, he wails inconsolably. He is incredibly musical, easily carrying a tune and singing by 12-months. He quickly learned his numbers and letters, which is strange given his otherwise limited vocabularly (though he is extremely expressive and gets his point across easily with gestures.) Our daughter appears to be more intelligent than our son, but she has that vaguely sociopathic, extremely charismatic edge that leads me to believe she’s a melonhead. I estimate 140s for her, high 120s for our son. He’s just an incredibly earnest, pure soul.

At any rate, I’m concerned as how to best raise this child. He does not do well and in a group setting, which suggests I will have to homeschool him. I think I have enough melonhead to not fully understand what makes him “tick,” but I intend to support and lead him to the best of my ability. Any insight is appreciated. How would your readers/forum members have liked to be parented? I am including photos of us and our son and am curious how you’d categorize us. I would like to participate in your forum, though I am not sure if I am “pure” enough. It’s extremely difficult for me to objectively classify myself and my husband.

Thank you in advance for your time and consideration. I am extremely grateful to have found your blog. I knew my son was unusual, but I had no grand unifying theory as to why that was the case. I look forward to your insight and please feel free to share any and all of my email and your response on your blog.

Hi —,

First, congrats on propagating such high quality genetics.

I will forward this email to Texas Arcane, the originator of these theories. He’s a very strong pure TT, whereas I am normal MT. So his childhood experience would be more relevant. I will give my advice but I may not know best.

I will probably quote this in a post, although I won’t post the pictures, as I’m sure you do not want that.

Based on the pics, your baby’s front is deep thal, which is the relevant part for developmental risk. The back is hard to judge with babies.

You and your husband both have Thal fronts. Your husband has a Melon back. I’m not sure about yours, too much hair. You could well be pure Thal though, and your baby as well.

I think you are probably underestimating your son’s IQ based on his delayed development in the verbal and social spheres. That’s natural for Thal children. Obviously you do not ever want to send him to school; he will get eaten alive. The younger, the worse.

I would advise you to as much as possible replicate the small Thal tribal setting. He doesn’t need much same-age play if that’s difficult to arrange; he can interact with adults. His close friends should be as Thal as possible.

Later on you’ll need to help him manage his transition to society. Ideally some sort of well-selected career path will largely circumvent a need for extensive socialization. Around puberty he should be introduced to introvert-friendly softcore Game (not heavy on the promiscuity and Machiavellian stuff, which he won’t like.) As he will certainly have some traumatic experiences, you should teach him face reading early and explain the differences between the major races. So that he does not internalize Cro Mag rejection.

Your maternal grandmother has shallow sockets and could well be full melon. While babies are tough to read, your daughter also appears to have dramatically shallower sockets.

Your son has extremely large eyes, which predicts sensitivity. I would take extreme care to safeguard him from emotional trauma.

Yes, you are welcome to join the forum. High IQ means either melon or Thal, and both are welcome. I’m an MT myself, after all. The invite will come in a separate email.

Best wishes,


One very important thing I forgot to mention:

He’s got to be able to physically defend himself against bullying, as early as possible. Make sure to proactively let him know in advance that you’ll back his play if he decides to get physical. Otherwise he’s going to take traumatic levels of grief before reacting. Teach him to fight as early as possible. With his level of sensitivity I doubt he’ll ever inappropriately initiate, so his aggression should be encouraged as much as possible. Far better that he get in some scraps than grow up broken in spirit.


I forgot about diet. Check out this very good post by Keoni Galt on the paleo baby. Although my evidence is purely anecdotal, I believe Thals suffer more from agricultural, processed foods, and pharmaceuticals. If you do go with a standard diet, you’ll want to at least check him for wheat intolerance (by elimination diet, no other reliable way). At puberty you’ll need to check him again, as the gut can change then. Especially if you notice a major drop in either physical activity or mood around then. Lastly, avoid drugs, particularly antibiotics, except in extremity. Particularly ignore any psychologist who wants to prescribe psychoactive drugs to his developing mind – even if he shows behavioral or cognitive problems.